1. You can enjoy beer all month long. 
 
 2. You don't have to wine and dine a beer. 
 
 3. Your beer will always wait patiently in the car while you play
football. 
 
 4. When your beer goes flat, you toss it out. 
 
 5. Beer is never late. 
 
 6. A beer does not get jealous when you grab another beer. 
 
 7. Hangovers go away. 
 
 8. Beer labels come off without a fight. 
 
 9. When you go to a bar, you know you can always pick up a beer. 
 
10. Beer never has a headache. 
 
11. After you have a beer, the bottle is 
     still worth five cents. 
 
12. You can share a beer with friends. 
 
13. Beer doesn't demand equality. 
 
14. A beer doesn't care when you come home. 
 
15. A frigid beer is a good beer. 
 
16. A beer won't get upset if you come home  
      and have another beer. 
 
17. A beer always goes down easy. 
 
18. You can have a beer in public. 
 
19. You always know you're the first one to have a beer. 
 
20. If you change beers, you don't have to pay alimony.